Archive for the ‘humour’ Category

Merry Christmas from the GWPF

Posted: December 22, 2014 by tallbloke in humour
Tags:

The Global Warming Policy Foundation sends seasons, greetings.

Xmas-GWPF

Anyone for dates?

Image

Image

Photo left credit Smudge 9000. Photo right, can’t read it [1].

Ofgem approves power link with Belgium

LONDON Tue Dec 2, 2014 11:14am GMT

(Reuters) – Ofgem has approved plans for a 1 gigawatt electricity interconnector link with Belgium, it said on Tuesday.

The Nemo interconnector would run from Zeebrugge, Belgium, to Kent in southern England, facilitating the flow of enough electricity to power up to 3 million homes, Britain’s Energy Secretary Ed Davey said in the Ofgem statement.

It is due to open in 2019, Ofgem said.

http://uk.reuters.com/article/2014/12/02/uk-britain-electricity-links-idUKKCN0JG0ZS20141202

Hmm… Aug. 21, 2014

Nuclear Shutdowns Leave Belgium Looking for Power Closure of Three Nuclear Power Plants Leaves Government Fearing Winter Energy Crunch

http://online.wsj.com/articles/nuclear-shutdowns-leave-belgium-looking-for-power-1408632643

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Met Office woolly forecast for Christmas 2014

Posted: November 25, 2014 by tchannon in Forecasting, humour, weather

Now the dank chill of late autumn gives way to winter frosts

english-winter-dusk

Dusk in winter, England, 1980s. The author.

 

Met Office 16 to 30 day forecast now stretches to Christmas Eve, not that it has changed over the past few days. A sudden weather change without a glimmer of notice for the 25th or 26th, I very much doubt it.

Met Office forecast for period day16to30 issued at 2014-11-25T16:00:00

 

Forecast for All regions (shared forecast) day16to30, from 2014-12-10 16hrs (Wed) to 2014-12-24 16hrs (Wed)

UK Outlook for Wednesday 10 Dec 2014 to Wednesday 24 Dec 2014:
  • There is no strong signal in weather patterns during this period.
  • However, the most likely scenario is a trend towards more unsettled and, at times, windy weather, especially in western parts of the UK, with eastern parts seeing the best of any dry weather.
  • Temperatures are generally expected to be around, or a little above, average for the time of year.
  • There is a chance of some overnight and morning frost and fog in places – this will be more likely across northern areas where there is also a chance of some snow on higher ground.

 

“There is no strong signal”. Aerial riggers called out…

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Artist Perry Grayson has made a vase decorated with motifs related to Chris Huhne, smashed it with a lump hammer, and repaired it, before displaying it in the National Portrait Gallery.

Grayson Perry vase

Grayson Perry’s vase features speed cameras, penises, Huhne, his mobile phone, personalised number plates, and wind turbines.

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[edit: I have made the serious mistake of not checking the date of the news story, is actually 2013 although the page is (c) 2014, tweet items there mention 2013 and I did spot the 99mph gust which I knew from last year,  ought to have twigged. Sorry folks. Tim.]

The Dungeness B nuclear power station in Kent is using diesel generators to power its site after both reactors shut down automatically due to a power cut

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-24700611

Logical, no ‘leccy so you can’t have any.

That’s six UK power stations now offline with unplanned stoppages.

A non story other than a defective infrastructure, presumably power lines were out. Is there no end to silly cockups?

Wrong kind of leaves on the line?

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josh-nurse

Visit cartoons by Josh and buy something!

From the grauniad:
Speaking ahead of an inaugural speech he will give next week as the incoming president of the British Science Association (BSA), Nurse said it was not enough for scientists to sit on the sidelines and sneer when public figures expounded unscientific nonsense.

He urged researchers to forge relationships with politicians, lobbyists, religious figures and leaders of organisations in the hope that they might feel ashamed to misuse scientific evidence.

But if that approach failed, Nurse urged researchers to call offenders out in the media and challenge them in the strongest way possible. “When they are serial offenders they should be crushed and buried,” Nurse said.

The Nobel prize winner will use his presidential address to argue that science has been the most revolutionary act in human history. He will trace the origins of scientific thinking from ancient times through the Copernican and Darwinian revolutions to modern times and warn that threats to science have always existed.

Oh the irony. Copernicus was afraid to publish precisely because he knew that some Nobel Nurse establishment type bigwig would be down on him like a ton of bricks for propounding theory contrary to that the establishment consensus held as immutable.

Paul Nurse is a serial offender himself, and Josh nicely sends him up in this cartoon.

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An hilarious story has turned up on WUWT via reader “saveenergy”

I took a peek at which vessel precisely, obviously some great big difficult to handle ship, err no. It’s a tiddler with thrusters, intended for manoeuvrability, close work. (the explanation of what happened is at the end of article)

Photos? You will have to find one yourself, all reasonable ones are copyright, no usage.

“The vessel is capable of serving the offshore industry in various tasks, such as: survey/ROV, seismic, crew change, accommodation, guard, chase [will do 11 knots], support, anti oil spill, seabed sampling and environmental surveillance.”

OMS Pollux

Nordic Offshore Marine

Slogan “The clever connection”

424 tonnes, is complete with Gymnasium. How about a lookout?
http://www.nordicoffshore.dk/nordic-offshore-projects/vessels

RNLI: “Lytham Lifeboat 3rd Mechanic Jon Trevorrow later said, “The casualty was making a good speed of 9 knots despite a list to port due to the weight of water on board.””
http://rnli.org/NewsCentre/Pages/THREE-LIFEBOATS-AID-WIND-FARM-SUPPORT-VESSEL-REFUSED-ENTRY-TO-IRISH-SEA-PORTS.aspx

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Climate quote of the week

Posted: August 12, 2014 by oldbrew in climate, humour, Psychobabble
Did I say that? [image credit: simpsons.wikia]

Did I say that?
[image credit: simpsons.wikia]

“The fundamental laws of physics say that as the temperature goes up, it has to get warmer,” Liu says.

Nice work Professor. Homer Simpson couldn’t have put it better.

So you still take "climate scientists" seriously?

Pulled out of the hat

Pulled out of the hat


You might like this recent announcement from The Science and Environmental Policy Project (SEPP).

***
On July 27, SEPP announced the winner of this year’s April Fools award at the annual meeting of the Doctors for Disaster Preparedness (DDP). Each year SEPP conducts its annual vote for the recipient of the coveted trophy, The Jackson, a piece of coal on a pedestal. Readers of The Week That Was are asked to nominate and vote for who they think is most deserving, following these criteria:

# The nominee has advanced, or proposes to advance, significant expansion of governmental power, regulation, or control over the public or significant sections of the general economy.
# The nominee does so by declaring such measures are necessary to protect public health, welfare, or the environment.
# The nominee declares that physical science supports such measures.
# The physical science supporting the measures is flimsy at best, and possibly non-existent.

There were 20 nominations representing 4 countries and the States of California and Vermont.
The votes have been tabulated.

[Drum roll]

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Not Geoffrey Lean  [image credit: BBC]

Not Geoffrey Lean
[image credit: BBC]

Fishy business – James Delingpole takes aim at the Telegraph’s leading ‘green’ reporter. Hard to miss really.

Dellers: ‘The Telegraph’s resident enviro loon Geoffrey Lean has come up with some new terrifying evidence for the existence of “global warming.” ‘

‘So what, er, is the new most important metric for global temperature rises, now that it’s not measured global temperature rises, our Geoff?
Well, apparently, it’s…..fish.’

Won’t spoil the fun – read it here

Formula One boss fast-tracks justice in Bavaria

Posted: August 6, 2014 by oldbrew in humour, Legal

f1picState of Bavaria prosecutor: “Mr Bernard Ecclestone, we charge you with the crime of bribery.”

Ecclestone: “Here’s a cheque for 100 million dollars.”

Prosecutor: “Wunderbar! That’ll do nicely.”

Judge: “Out of court settlement – case dismissed.”

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/f1-boss-bernie-ecclestone-pays-staggering-60million-out-of-court-settlement-to-be-cleared-of-bribery-charges-in-germany-9648030.html

Whoa, what is going on?

GWPF have an amusing new story based on a Fox News article dated 20th July

In the run-up to the U.N. climate conference (COP20) in Lima in December, Peru’s government just rolled back environmental regulations in an effort to boost mining.

http://www.thegwpf.org/ahead-of-u-n-climate-talks-peru-slashes-environmental-regulations/

Reuters have a new story dated 23rd July

Peru’s Humala replaces prime minister amid political scandal

(Reuters) – Peru’s President Ollanta Humala said on Tuesday he is replacing his prime minister following an embarrassing political scandal that marks the start of his sixth cabinet and his third year in office.

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Rounders, Baseball, wots wrong with the game

Posted: July 17, 2014 by tchannon in humour

Bit off base for the Talkshop

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The Daily Mail is having fun provided you can take the celebrity boobs and bottoms …

batman-covers

That’s right, exploding manhole covers. The Health and Safety Executive has warned pedestrians to be on the alert after a series of manhole cover explosions in London’s West End.

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Things to Come

Posted: July 9, 2014 by tallbloke in humour

tallbloke:

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FenBeagle cruises the delta pathways of future possibility while he still has a light on …

Originally posted on fenbeagleblog:

Things to come 2

View original

Fish ate my grant story

Posted: July 5, 2014 by tchannon in alarmism, humour

Warwick Hughes has a lovely story of belief shattered by actually looking, although I suppose the qudos goes to actually owning up.

The article he cites includes

An international team of experts has found evidence there is 100 times less plastic on ocean surfaces than expected.

and

The plastic particles that are missing might be ingested by fish. That one possibility is… the most likely one.”

To which a commenter at Hugh’s ripostes

I ran a fish factory for 8 years, processing thousands of tonnes of fish. I found 1 plastic bag in a fish stomach, a cod caught half way between Australia and Indonesia in over 100 metres deep water.

http://www.warwickhughes.com/blog/?p=3107

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Oh noes! H/T to Oldbrew for spotting this GWPF story culled from the Times:

josh-hammer-of-the-scots

Don’t forget to visit cartoonsbyjosh.com and buy something

EU COURT ENDS SALMOND’S HOPES FOR GREEN SUBSIDIES
Date: 04/07/14 Peter Jones, The Times

Alex Salmond’s hopes that the economy of an independent Scotland could rely on expanding renewable energy generation have been crippled by a European Court of Justice ruling.

The court has said that no government must pay subsidies to renewable generators in another country. The ruling removes any legal foundation for the first minister’s claim that the rest of Britain would continue to pay a subsidy — more than £500 million a year — to Scottish renewable generators for their green energy.

Pro-Union sources said that the ruling could mean higher energy bills after a “yes” vote. It also leaves the future of the industry, if there is a “yes” vote, resting on the hope of a negotiated agreement between the Scottish and British governments, which Westminster has said is unlikely.

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A few years ago, I started a wikipedia page on the Gore Effect; the uncanny phenomenon which unleashes snow, hail, torrential rain, icy winds and sleet on the venues where Al Gore is speaking about global warming. The instances are too numerous to list. My page got deleted within a few months by the usual suspects. But it was reborn when another wiki user put up a much more detailed and better referenced version, and I thought it unassailable. But no, the usual suspects are at it again:

gore-effect

Maybe big Al has been armtwisting Jimmy Wales with the promise of a big donation on condition it goes. Who knows.

Contributor ‘Aussie’ notes this morning that the Gore Effect continues undiminished:

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‘Anders’, the proprietor of popular warmist blog ‘and then there’s physics’ issued me with a challenge when I commented on his post about the ‘little ice age recovery‘.

anders1

 

“Try doing some actual physics” he said. So I responded:

 

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oldbrew:

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Climate science – calling it wrong since 19??


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Originally posted on Real Science:

Ten climate forecasts which demonstrate that the world’s leading government climate experts have absolutely no clue what they are talking about.

NASA’s top experts said that burning fossil fuels would trigger an ice age.

ScreenHunter_390 Jun. 08 22.44

U.S. Scientist Sees New Ice Age Coming

Snow is a thing of the past.

ScreenHunter_391 Jun. 08 22.46

Snowfalls are now just a thing of the past – Environment – The Independent

Arctic ice free by 2000

ScreenHunter_392 Jun. 08 22.49

The Changing Face of the Arctic – Article – NYTimes.com

New ice age coming

ScreenHunter_05 May. 07 09.01ScreenHunter_06 May. 07 09.01The Windsor Star – Google News Archive Search

Manhattan underwater by 2008

ScreenHunter_393 Jun. 08 22.54Stormy weather – Salon.com

Arctic ice free by 2013

ScreenHunter_394 Jun. 08 22.57

BBC NEWS | Science/Nature | Arctic summers ice-free ‘by 2013′

Antarctica will soon be the only place to live.

ScreenHunter_395 Jun. 08 22.59

Why Antarctica will soon be the only place to live – literally – Environment – The Independent

Skiing is doomed

ScreenHunter_396 Jun. 08 23.01

Skiing is ‘doomed’ … so enjoy it while it lasts…

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