We’ve read about the hockey CRU
And Phil Jones’ neck of brass
Now McIntyre’s grabbed the stick
And shoved it up their
Ask no questions, tell no lies
Will the next job for the CRU
Be dishing up the fries?
Sir Ted has got a tricky job
To cover up the mess
“Tell the CRU to shut their gob
We never will confess!”
“Hide the Yamal data
And cover that decline!
Tell the press the Alma Mater
Will carry on just fine.”
But you should know Sir Edward
With all your old boy clout
That when it comes to science
The truth will always out.
Along the Climate Audit trail
The urban and the rurals
A few at CRU have gone quite pale
Steve’s got ‘em by the Urals!
Me and Mr. Jones, we got a thing going on,
We both know that it’s wrong
But it’s much too strong to let it cool down now.
We meet ev’ry day at the same cafe,
Six-thirty I know he’ll be there,
Holding hands, making all kinds of plans
While the super-computer plays our favorite simulation.
Me and Mrs., Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones,
Mr. Jones got a thing going on,
We both know that it’s wrong,
But it’s much too strong to let it cool down now.
We gotta be extra careful that we don’t build our hopes too high
Cause he’s got her own obligations and so do I,
Me, me and Mr., Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones,
Mr. Jones got a thing going on,
We both know that it’s wrong,
But it’s much too strong to let it cool down now.
Well, it’s time for us to be leaving,
Iit hurts so much, it hurts so much inside,
Now he’ll go him way and I’ll go mine,
But tomorrow we’ll meet the same place, the same time.
Mr. , Mr. Jones , me, Briffa, and my beloved, single and lonely siberian tree
be careful Tallbloke…have they finished water-boarding your hard-drives yet?
Lol, no worries diogenes, the hard drives are in sealed evidence bags in my safe.
I see a famous blogger likes this poem. :)
One TreeRing to rule them all, One TreeRing to find them,
One TreeRing to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
Lucy Skywalker:
Tolkien’s hard to beat, but here goes anyway
TreeRings in the boxes
A pocket full of proxies
A trick
Hockey stick
And the graph bends up!
There once was a tree in Nantucket
Whose rings the CRU gathered to look at
The story they told was so fine
But, alas, at the end a decline
Keith was heard to mutter “Aw, let’s look elsewhere”
Siberian Weird Sisters Song
Hoxy poxy
Sproxy proxy
Docksy clocksy
Brokesy hockeysticks
Ask us no questions
We’ll tell you no lies
Treering peering
Data fearing
FOIA nearing
Courtly hearing
Ask us no questions
We’ll tell you no lies
Golden fame
Nobel claim
Skeptics to blame
oh shame oh shame
Ask us no questions
We’ll tell you no lies
IPCC
palmy greasy
tricky precis
easy peasy
Ask us no questions
We’ll tell you no lies
Science corrupt
Data obstruct
FOIA no luck
oh dear oh dear
Ask us no questions
We’ll tell you no lies
Excellent! Keep ‘em coming :)
All ye who used dendrodchronology
To construct a corrupt climatology
You’ve committed a tort
And really you ought
Offer science a humble apology
Mann this is Funn :-)
There once was a fellow called Mann,
who came up with a devious plan,
but Steve Mac and Ross
proved his work was all dross
and that made the [snip] hit the fan
Er…horsetooth fossils?
As well as Mike Mann
There’s Walsh and Chapman
Their Hockey Stick’s almost as nice
It’s based not on trees
But on extent of freeze
Of the dwindling Arctic sea ice
Ode to Catastrophic Mann Made Global Warming
As I was walking up the stair,
I met a Mann who wasn’t there.
He wasn’t there again today.
I wish that Mann would go away.
(Adapted from a poem by Hughes Mearns)
Remember…
When playing a shell game with the IPCC, always watch for the Mann behind you trying to pick your pocket.
Phil Jones and the gang at the CRU
Are wondering just what to do
Their data from trees
Has been chopped at the knees
Now they’ve been opened to view
In reply to Roger Andrews:
The satellites are twirling
Their PVs re-furling
As they dance in the lessening drag
Their sensors degrading
And errors invading
Along with old bias’es Red Flag
Poetry, satire and the humble traveling minstrel were the first and only methods available in ye olde england to spread news and discontent of the failings of the powers that were.
They did try to control this flow of information but failed miserably, much like our modern hockey team and government apologists, they also have no answer to open minds and the internet.
I also noted Anthony’s thumbs up to your poetry. I have noted that Willis has been almost absent at WUWT ? Anthony is a gentleman who always tries to do what is reasonable and right.
Humour and ridicule will be the downfall of the consensus team as science and climate points out their failings and more people start pointing the fickle finger of fate at them.
Deprogramming all the children in the education system will be the only unfunny part.
Ah yes, the Minstrel in the Gallery. One of my favourite Tull songs. This clip include some interview footage which is very apposite to the discussion. Iain Anderson, the band’s leader, discussing the way Rock became organised, more ‘dressed up and showy’, in order to satisfy the people paying for it, and those gaining from it (including themselves) and the requirements of the ‘big stage’ limelight into which it was catapulted. The humorous, humble and self deprecating attitude this highly talented entertainer displays is something certain ‘Bigshot’ Climatologists and politicians could do to learn from in my opinion. The action starts at 0.28:
Higgledy Piggledy
Philip D Jonesius
Tells us of proxies
That come from Yamal
Next he’ll be telling us
Predictability
Is easier to do
than a trend in Excel
TB
Yes, it’s curious how the blade of the W/C hockey stick coincides with satellite measurements.
And if you want more things
The GISS anthrop forcings
They too show a hockey stick bend
But if ATE cools it
These forcings are bool(snip)
The truth will come out in the end
Some say apocalypse is near,
apocalypse, ye all know
it is not the end
but illumination from above,
light from beyond, out from the Source itself coming,
it´s minds´ illumination,
it´s clear thoughts,
men, again, the universal truths finding,
liars and cheaters
going back to the hell they came from,
the beacon of truth, shining forth,
long forgotten secrets´ disclosure,
long forgotten laws once more by man known,
our destiny, the purpose of life,
cycles closing cycles,
the Eden, anew, for Noble men.
The Hockey Stick Illusion
Collusion, delusion, confusion
Starting in the mind
Moving to the guts
Feeling for ‘the Cause’
Becoming Eco-nuts
Addiction to applause
No pause to re-assess
Regression’s chancing guess
Time to walk on moors
Inner self confess
Knowing in the heart
More or less ignores
The horse before the cart
Pulling all our stores
The stable door behind
Swings shut upon the mind
Before the freshened start
Leaves the past behind
Baa baa climate sheep
Have you any wool
Yes plenty pull it over their eyes.
Tree rings, wee things are,
Important only from afar.
Mann-made global crap………
From The Pirates of Pennzance
Too late, ha ha
Too late, ho ho
Ha ha ha ha
Ho ho ho ho
Here’s a first-rate opportunity
To get funding with impunity,
And indulge in the felicity
Of unbounded Nobel-icity.
I shall quickly be Al Glorified,
Conjugally politicized,
By the doctors of perfidity,
Who are located in this vicinity.
What could go wrong ??
The Crazy World of James Hansen
I am the god of hell fire and I bring you:
Fire
I’ll take you to burn.
Fire
I’ll take you to learn.
I’ll see you burn!
You fought hard and you saved and learned
but all of it’s going to burn.
And your mind
your tiny mind
you know you’ve really been so blind.
Now’s your time burn your mind.
You’re falling far too far behind.
Oh no
oh no
oh no
you gonna burn!
Fire
to destroy all you’ve done.
Fire
to end all you’ve become.
I’ll feel your burn!
You’ve been living like a little girl
in the middle of your little world.
and your mind
your tiny mind
you know you’ve really been so blind.
Now’s your time burn your mind
you’re falling far too far behind.
tallbloke says: May 8, 2012 at 12:40 pm
Ah yes, the Minstrel in the Gallery. One of my favourite Tull songs.
Dedicated to rising sea levels:
Jethro Tull – Aqualung – Live 1978
Dedicated to settled scientists:
Jethro Tull – Skating Away On The Thin Ice – Live 1977
Laurel & Hardy – The Trail of the Lonesome Pine
In the Blue Ridge Mountains of Yamal
On the trail of the lonesome Pine
In the pale moonshine our hearts entwine
Where you carved your name and I carved mine.
Oh, you – like the mountains are blue
Like the pine – I am lonesome for you
In the Blue Ridge Mountains of Yamal
On the trail of the lonesome Pine.
On a mountain in Yamal stands a lonesome Pine
Just below is the little cabin home of a little girl of mine
Her name is June and very, very soon she”ll belong to me
For I know she”s waiting there for me ”neath that lone Pine tree.
Nice poetic licence there Tim. Yamal is pretty flat. Perhaps you mean the Polar Urals? Gad, you got me launched…
A: Treerings. When you’ve seen one you’ve seen Yamal
B: Actually, Ural different.
Some are spruced up, some larch around, drunk ones larching and falling down the riverbank, there’s one larching down a dark alleyway waiting to beat the cr*p out of you, what’s not to larch? Pining for some variety. Fir’s fir, I say.
My effort, with apologies to Counting Crows’ song ‘Mr Jones’
I was down at the paleo lab staring at my tree ring chronology
Dr. Jones strikes up a conversation about the govenment and the IPCC
Proxies dance while he plays with prinicpal components
The hockey stick’s suddenly beautiful
We all want it to be beautiful
I wish my work was so beautiful
Proxies dance this science down to perfection
Cut Yamal! Show me some of them Russian dances
Pass me a bottle, Dr. Jones
Believe in tree
Help me believe it says anything
I want to be someone who believes
Dr. Jones and me tell each other fairy tales
Stare at the beautiful proxies
“She’s looking good Mann. She’s ready for the IPCC.”
Imagining the bright lights
Of the Nobel Prize in Oslo
When everybody loves you, you will never be unpublished
I will paint the picture
Paint proxies in blue and red and black and gray
All of the beautiful colors are very very meaningful
Modern temperatures added in in black color
It felt so shambolic yesterday
’til I thought of the Nature trick
To give us the right picture today
Dr. Jones and me look into the future
Stare at the beautiful proxies
“She’s looking good Mann
Sure she’s ready for the IPCC.”
Standing in the spotlight
I bought myself a gray suit
When everybody loves me, I will never be unpublished
Dr. Jones and me staring at the reconstruction
When I look at the television, I want to see me staring right back at me
We all want to be big stars, heroes to world governments and how
But when everybody loves me, I’m going to be just about as happy as can be
Dr. Jones and me, we’re gonna be big stars…
In case you need the original to apreciate it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-oqAU5VxFWs
“Chopping Up Wood on a Snowy Evening”
By Michael Mann
What tree this is, I think I know.
It grew in Yamal some time ago.
Yamal 06 I’m placing here
In hopes a hockey stick will grow.
But McIntyre did think it queer
No tree, the stick did disappear!
Desparate measures I did take
To make the stick reappear.
There were some corings from a lake,
And other data I could bake.
I’ll tweek my model more until
Another hockey stick I’ll make!
I changed a line into a hill!
I can’t say how I was thrilled!
Then Climategate. I’m feeling ill.
Then Climategate. I’m feeling ill.
Reblogged this on Climate Ponderings.