Caption Competition: Lord Monckton at the Doh! Ha! Climate Circus

Posted: December 5, 2012 by tallbloke in humour, Philosophy, Photography

Come on talkshop, give us a good caption for this picture of Lord Christopher Monckton at the Doha COP18 Climate Circus.



So thats why he was wearing the costume: Clever ploy Lord Monckton. 🙂

“An excerpt from an E &E Newswire story

After the news conference, and as diplomats gathered for the climate conference president’s assessment of how close countries are to agreement, Monckton quietly slipped into the seat reserved for the delegation of Myanmar and clicked the button to speak.

“In the 16 years we have been coming to these conferences, there has been no global warming,” Monckton said as confused murmurs filled the hall and then turned into a chorus of boos.
The stunt infuriated negotiators and activists here who gather every year to address what they believe is one of the world’s top threats, the steady rise of man-made global warming.

As Monckton was escorted from the hall and security officers stripped him of his U.N. credentials, several people noted that just a few hours earlier a group of young activists had been thrown out of the convention center and deported. Their crime: unfurling an unauthorized banner calling for the Qatari hosts to lead the negotiations to a strong conclusion.

By late today, several activists attending the conference had posted calls to “deport Monckton” on their Twitter feeds”

H/T Anthony Watts at WUWT

  1. tallbloke says:

    “So I stuck my hands under mother Teresa’s armpits like this.
    And she said – Watch out! This camel’s got two humps”…”

  2. “According to the BBC, it’s a lot bigger, and they’re the ones to really trust on this”

  3. dp says:

    The great American singer Tony Bennet said it best in song:

    “I know I’d go from rags to riches
    If you would only say you care
    And though my pocket may be empty
    I’d be a millionaire”

  4. tallbloke says:

    Roddy Campbell ‏@Roddy_Campbell


    He always likes sheikhing things up.

  5. michael hart says:

    “The only other one left in the shop was a BBC DJ costume. It had a gold medallion this big, engraved with the words ‘BBC Science Fixed the Climate Debate For Me’…..

  6. Jostemikk says:

    “As you now clearly can understand, I have this huge advantage in my relation to women.”

  7. mkelly says:

    “I’m thinking of getting into a wet robe contest, but I’m not wearing any BVD’s.”

  8. michael hart says:

    When I were a lad, wide-bodied jets were this big, and they ran on rubber-bands, not fossil fuels….

  9. michael hart says:

    “It’s a fair COP. You’ve rumbled me…”

  10. michael hart says:

    “And how did you get here, young man? Oh you hitched a lift on an A380? Schweeet.
    I rode here pillion, on the back of a dromedary…”

  11. michael hart says:

    “That bloke, over to my left. And in the drinking-fountain too!….”

  12. oldbrew says:

    I can fold up my tent this small, how about you?

  13. tchannon says:

    Who’s gonna call yer?

  14. Hans Jelbring says:

    Young man, I am illustrating the tactic of sailing under false flag.
    Nodody belives I am this much an arab and carbon dioxide change doesn´t change climate this much either.

  15. oldbrew says:

    All I need now is my own oil field.

  16. Entropic man says:

    How many climate change sceptics do you need to change a light bulb?

    None, it’s a natural cycle. The bulb will come back on again on its own..

    [Reply] How many environmentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

    50. One to hold the (low energy) bulb and 49 to spin the room round. 😉

  17. Zeke says:

    Perhaps something a little more spiritual, or cultural, is intended by the flowing white robe.
    He is explaining that although there has been no warming for the last 16 years, we should all be very good and nice to each other, and renounce our greedy lifestyle and our hunger for resources, and reduce our carbon foot print.

  18. graphicconception says:

    “Hello, I’m Sheik Q’e’mup bin There al Baby …”

  19. Gray says:

    So, I went to lost luggage and said the bag is only this big…

  20. Zeke says:

    I have done a search and I cannot find out what Christopher Monckton was really up to.

    He has been bringing glad tidings of great joy to all people, that there has been no warming for the last 16 years (: So I guess there will be no need, after all, to entirely centralize and remake our economies in global climate/sustainable development initiatives.

    So tallbloke, are you going to tell us what on earth he is dressed as?!

  21. tallbloke says:

    I think his Lordship fancies himself as Lawrence of Arabia. 🙂

    Lawrence was an army officer who went native and won some notable (if bloodthirsty) victories against the Turks by enlisting the help of the Arab bedouin. After he returned to England (in disgrace for disobeying orders) he changed his name and re-enlisted as a low ranked serviceman. He endeared himself to his fellows by racing his Brough Superior round the countryside collecting scarce commodities like bacon and sausages on the way.

    “Boa is a top-gear machine, as sweet in that as most single-cylinders in middle. I chug lordlily past the guard-room and through the speed limit at no more than sixteen. Round the bend, past the farm, and the way straightens. Now for it. The engine’s final development is fifty-two horsepower. A miracle that all this docile strength waits behind one tiny lever for the pleasure of my hand.
    “Another bend: and I have the honour of one of England’s straightest and fastest roads. The burble of my exhaust unwound like a long cord behind me. Soon my speed snapped it, and I heard only the cry of the wind which my battering head split and fended aside. The cry rose with my speed to a shriek: while the air’s coldness streamed like two jets of iced water into my dissolving eyes. I screwed them to slits, and focused my sight two hundred yards ahead of me on the empty mosaic of the tar’s gravelled undulations.”

    “…Over the first pot-hole Boanerges screamed in surprise, its mud-guard bottoming with a yawp upon the tyre. Through the plunges of the next ten seconds I clung on, wedging my gloved hand in the throttle lever so that no bump should close it and spoil our speed…

    “A skittish motor-bike with a touch of blood in it is better than all the riding animals on earth, because of its logical extension of our faculties, and the hint, the provocations, to excess conferred by its honeyed untiring smoothness. Because Boa loves me, he gives me five more miles of speed than a stranger would get from him.”

    Excerpts from The Road, a chapter of The Mint by T.E. Lawrence

    I have a copy of ‘The Mint’ somewhere…

    Also, this.

  22. vukcevic says:

    – You are oil sheik, right?
    – God willing.
    – How big is your oil derek?
    – My noble modesty will not let me exaggerate.

  23. J Martin says:

    “Are you, by any chance, Mystic Meg ?”

  24. Scute says:

    I assure you, I AM a member of the House…of Saud.

  25. Gary Richardson says:

    “Actually I’m looking for the Manager not the manger”
    The 4th. Wise Man

  26. Streetcred says:

    C’mon, I’ll look after that bag of funding for you … quickly now, son !

  27. tchannon says:

    All I did was ask for a clean sheik. How was I to know he was the laundry man?

  28. ferd berple says:

    by Allah, by my Allah, by very Allah, the sun rose upon us

  29. tallbloke says:


    “And Lo!, it provided a lot more warmth than co2 did in the night”

  30. Bill Wagstick says:

    Alleluia Akbar

  31. oldbrew says:

    Monckton explains all, including his attempt to mount a camel for a desert photo opportunity.

    Before I was halfway into the cloth-covered saddle, Aziz lurched to his feet, flinging me into an elegant and spectacular parabolic trajectory. Upon re-entry, I achieved terminal velocity and crashed firmly into a convenient sand-dune, executing a well-judged judo fall of which my Staff-Sergeant would have been proud. I remembered to go completely limp at the last instant. Sand sprayed in all directions and a new peninsula was created on the Gulf shore.

  32. J. Richards says:

    “Actually, after watching how the media groups attempt to screw with the actual science of climate, I think of them as the Muzzle-em Brotherhood.”

  33. spence says:

    This is how you modify a camel to go 100 miles further across the desert, take it to water and make it drink all that it can, then you sneek behind with a housebrick in each hand, whack! Smack on the testicles, when the camel opens its mouth to scream, you dip its head back in the water.

  34. G. Watkins says:

    No, sonny boy, you misunderstand. I’m a Welsh Druid. I recently met with St David (patron saint of wet weather) in a cave in Snowdonia. He instructed me to come to Doha and warn of the imminent approach of Global Cooling but no-one listens. Fools, Dewi is always right as he gets his info. straight from The Big Man himself.

  35. Craig M says:

    “Have you seen the missing hotspot? It’s about this big”

  36. adolfogiurfa says:

    Is it a photoshop?. If true then it was a sign of respect of Lord Monckton to the place and culture he is visiting, or a marketing tool; I would not be surprised if he speaks arabic. Surprising!

  37. AJB says:

    Salam Alaikum. I’ll lick ’em, s’only Al and Mann.

  38. tallbloke says:

    Oh Noes!

    samantha cooper ‏@samcooper91
    Monckton debadged for speaking as a party delegate at #COP18 I’m confused – if he gets deported will he go to UK or Myanmar

  39. Actually, I AM a Lord, but I play a sheik on TV.

  40. tallbloke says:


    Leo Hickman ‏@LeoHickman
    RT @UN_ClimateTalks Lord Monckton has been debadged + escorted out of #COP18 venue for impersonating a Party and violating code of conduct

    Rog Tallbloke ‏@rogtallbloke
    @LeoHickman Impersonating a party? Sounds like a sheikh-down, stop trifling with the man!

  41. tallbloke says:

    Thread updated.


  42. normalnew says:

    I got one 😀 ( ..just in case)

    [Reply] We have a winner. If your email addy is valid, the prize is yours. 🙂

  43. normalnew says:

    thanks, it was too easy. Fun day 🙂
    (email is valid)

  44. Hugo M says:

    Here is a short video showing Lord Monckton during his speech in Doha. Although the film was produced by a malevolent opponent, it still shows the eyes of a surprised delegate shining with joy …

  45. Mike Haseler says:

    And you have no idea how the plane took off with you still on board!
    And did you ever find the guitar?

  46. vukcevic says:

    🙂 🙂 🙂
    Hey TB
    Entry you selected is an excellent one.
    English fair play, please. This is a world wide read blog.
    Competition started before Monckton was thrown out, which came late last night.
    Entries referring to it should be disqualified, or you extend it to give equal chance to others.
    🙂 🙂 🙂

  47. adolfogiurfa says:

    This is the “clean” version of Lord Monckton´s intervention at Doha:

  48. Tim Cullen says:

    Sorry old chap. The last time I gave to your charity they stuck it up me this far!

  49. So I said, “Jamaica?”

  50. vukcevic says:

    Thanks Adolfo
    Once long time ago, the Arabs were great scientists; numbers, mathematics, astronomy etc. ..
    chair of the meeting should have remembered that

  51. vukcevic says:

    This IPCC graph definitely show that Lord Moncton’s claim is wrong!

  52. Susan Fraser says:

    Still trying to fit in I see, Lord Monckton.

  53. trucker bob says:

    Although I’m too late for the prize my suggestion is:

    “Me? Im the sheik of speak!”

  54. coldoldman says:

    “I say, can you help me? I’ve found a pile of statistics on GW and need a bag to put them in. Nothing too large, about this size should do it and that’ll leave room for some dirty shirts and underwear.”

  55. CrazyParrot says:

    “For you I make good price …. only 5 camels”

  56. carter says:

    ‘Honest it’s this big! I mean I’m not known for being economical with the truth ever!

  57. tallbloke says:

    Uh-oh, warmy invasion. 🙂

  58. Tim says:

    “You see, I’m really not the messiah – I’m just a very naughty boy.”

  59. osopolitico says:

    An Eastern Hammam? – well, it is a hole in the ground about this wide…

  60. Grant (NZ) says:

    The Monck in an unusual habit

  61. Grant (NZ) says:

    Have you seen another two dressed as I am? We are seeking the virgin who as just given birth to the Messiah. I believe He will be in a manager about yay big.

  62. Well you see , I am the Ghost of Conferences Past, doomed to haunt these pointless gatherings for all eternity, or for so long as they may continue, whichever should come first..